Charlyne Cares


Charlyne Cares is a daily reminder that God cares and that we care about your marriage. Each morning Charlyne sends a devotional and Bob does a Prodigal Perspective on Tuesdays. These come from someone who has experienced the tragedy of divorce and the triumph of a family restored by God speaking to Charlyne's heart not to give up on their marriage after she divorced Bob.

Today's Charlyne Cares Devotional

Friday, August 29, 2014

“Zip the Lips” has almost become Charlyne’s trademarked advice to standers. What are you speaking each day? Does your husband or wife just push your buttons to start screaming and make you sound like you are not even a Christian? Do you sound like you are praying for your spouse to come home? In this teaching, Charlyne shares about the words a stander needs to be using in their relationships with not only a spouse, but with others as well. Do you have trouble with your tongue? This teaching will really help you! What are you speaking every day?
Available as CD or MP3 Download
It is to a man’s honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel.  Proverbs 20:3
We hear from standers every week who have written email that says they have blown their stand with their spouse by losing their temper and then having a huge fight. If that should happen, repent and ask for forgiveness of your part immediately. Ask the Lord to erase all the words that you should not have said.

“Lord, I ask that You will erase all the words that were said in anger and I pray that you will remove this argument from my spouse’s memory. I pray You will block the enemy playing rewind in their mind of all the words that were said carelessly. I pray that I will learn from this experience; that I will learn how to control my words and actions. I pray this in the mighty Name of Jesus. Amen.”
Then trust the Lord, praising Him, thanking Him that He is in control of your life and learn from your mistakes. Let me share a scripture that you can personalize and pray as a prayer for yourself or for loved ones:

Listen, for I have worthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse.  Proverbs 8:6-8
The Lord has revealed to me that the Word of God has the answers and the Holy Spirit will empower you to be able to use self-control which is one of the Fruit of the Spirit. We need to learn this now because you need to be ready when your spouse comes home. If your spouse is home, continue to pray for your them to become closer and reignite the love back into your marriage as the Lord created marriage to be.
If strife, quarreling or fighting with words is a problem in your own family, ask the Holy Spirit to change you first and then start praying for your spouse or any other family member who may need to learn to control their words that are out to hurt or cut down other loved ones.

“Lord, mold me, and make me into a person who has control of my own words and actions. May I not judge others, but learn how to speak and react as my Lord would. Thank You, Lord for changing me and my spouse’s hearts, our lives and resurrecting our marriage. Amen.”
Even so the tongue is a little member and boasts great things. See how great a forest a little fire kindles! And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and creature of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by mankind. But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God. Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be so. Does a spring send forth fresh water and bitter from the same opening?  James 3:5-11 (NKJV)
How many homes do you know where there is strife going on for many different reasons? The enemy will cause contention or strife when you have conversations or you may be in a dispute or disagreement about finances, responsibilities, commitments, children or other circumstances that you are facing. Learn the enemy’s tricks and schemes and learn to hold your tongue or as I say, “zip your lips,” even if someone else is berating or criticizing you. Ask the Holy Spirit to give you self-control and then pray. Ask the Holy Spirit to be your Advocate and Defender as you talk to someone who is upset or angry. Ask the Lord to give you wisdom on how to answer, change the subject or that the other person will agree to stop the conversation for the time being.
If an argument starts, it often does not matter what was said or who started it because you and someone else can get into a disagreement over very foolish subjects and then be upset with yourself later. The enemy loves to cause strife in our homes.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.  Proverbs 15:1
A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel.  Proverbs 15:18

I know that this may be a very big challenge for you if you do not have control of your speech, words or behavior or you may be able to say today, “Thank You Lord, you have already changed me in this area.” Our goal is to have peace, love and happiness in our homes.
Let me ask you today to pray for all our families to learn to control their speech and reactions. Let us especially pray for our standers who are alone and struggling with teenagers who are exposed to schools where students can say just about anything in the hallways during class break. You as a parent need to learn this with your teenagers. Do not allow strife and quarreling to be part of your home.

Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sins.  Psalm 51:2
The media, movies and many other people across the United States or around the world are now able to use off-color slurs, innuendos and profanity on television and in movies so that we have become desensitized to what is right or wrong. We must cleanse our mouths and minds from all impurities and stand up for the righteousness of God.
Jesus Christ is the solution and answer to touch and change every family member to become saved and then live a lifestyle to be more Christ-like each and every day.
Will you join me in praying for our homes to become havens of peace and not homes where fighting and screaming is the norm? If we do not take this challenge, what will your children be saying and doing when they grow up to be adults?

He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity. Proverbs 21:23

God bless,

Charlyne Steinkamp
Rejoice Marriage Ministries, Inc.

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Weekly Scripture Memorization:
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.  Isaiah 40:28

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