Much of what we do through Rejoice Marriage Ministries, Inc. is measured against how it would have affected me when Bob and I were divorced, and then after we remarried.
We receive many notices of spouses coming home each week. From that joyful date, it is going to take the couple about two years to heal the hurts, forget that other person, and to reconcile. Only then will they be ready to help other couples. We will never knowingly harm a struggling couple by publishing a premature restoration report. We hear of too many prodigals who leave again, because too much was being said.
These pages are not intended to be a report of all Rejoice restored marriages. Neither are they trophies for this Ministry. They are published to give you hope and encouragement.
"PLT! After being separated for many months, my husband texted me and asked if he could come home. I said yes. He arrived with all of his items packed in his car. I stepped into my suddenly season and received my long awaited breakthrough. God does hear and answers our prayers. His word will not return to him void. Thank you Charlyne and RMM for teaching me to be patient and trust in the Lord with all my heart. Your daily devotionals have been a blessing to me. I will continue to pray for all standers and prodigals to come home suddenly as mine did. To God Be The Glory." (Michigan)(posted 3/14/2011)
“Praise be to God! After several years of being separated and standing all this time believing God for a miracle, glory to God, my miracle is done. He wants to come home. Thank you, Holy Spirit for speaking through this ministry. I open my arms in praise because I know this was a miracle.” (Dominican Republic)(posted 8/30/2012)
“Hallelujah! After being a prodigal wife for almost two years, God had blessed me with a softened heart. Much to my dismay, my standing husband suddenly changed. He was no longer interested in me. Deeply saddened and hurt, I lost hope with another woman being in the picture. I started to pray like I never did before. My children prayed often. I asked others to pray for my family if they hadn't already been doing so. Then a weekend of unfortunate events led to a sudden change of heart for my husband. It only took a few days for God to soften his heart and bring him back home. We are all under the same roof again and loving each minute. We've vowed to keep God in our lives and pray for all marriages. I give God all the glory. Don't ever give up! Keep standing!” (Florida)(posted 8/26/2013)
GOD IS A RESTORER
Finally, brothers and sisters, rejoice! Strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you. 2 Corinthians 13:11
In 2009 when my husband was expressing thoughts of suddenly not wanting to be married, I did not know to turn to the greatest healer there is, our Lord Jesus Christ. I believed in God and knew I wanted to go to Heaven when I died but that was the extent of my relationship with Him. Instead of leaning on God and turning to His Word, I turned to friends and took into account their perspective on my marriage, my husband and how to handle things going forward.
Some people said, “Kick him out, he needs tough love” others said, “give him a taste of his own medicine, make him jealous” and some said, “Whatever you do, don’t let him think you’ll wait while he figures this out or he’ll just use you.”
I spent months trying all the above while my husband fell further into sin. I did not get on my knees and ask the only true and living God what He wanted me to do. As a result things got worse until I discovered there was another person and that is when I really showed the enemy at work within me as I lashed out and verbally abused and physically attacked the man God called me to love unconditionally.
But God! God has a perfect plan even through the storm. Just as David had to literally run for his life for seven years even though he had been appointed king, God used that time to strengthen his character and mature him naturally and spiritually until he arrived at his appointed position! God did the same for me as my husband took up residentce a mile away from home and continued the non-covenant relationship. All the well-intentioned advice had gotten me nowhere so I finally surrendered to the Lord, fell onto the floor prostrate and cried out about what to do.
Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. Jeremiah 33:3
It was then that God began to speak to me through His Word, supernaturally with signs and prophetic messages and it was only then when I received peace about my situation. No, my fellow standers, it did not remove the excruciating pain I felt and things did not immediately turn around in the natural but I had huge hope in my heart and I had a mustard-seed size of faith that God would do what His Word promises He will do. My husband would say things in the natural that sounded bleak, but I’d smile and nod my head and give it over to Christ knowing full well that this was only a season and despite what the words were that came out of his mouth, God was still going to tear down the veil of deception from my husband’s eyes.
He replied, “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will obey you. Luke 17:6
I put my wedding ring back on and went to everyone who I had spoken an ill word about my husband and our circumstances and proclaimed what God would do. I immersed myself in God’s Word and the lessons from RMM. I went to church and weekly Bible studies, prayed, fasted, travailed and began to show my husband unconditional love, always seeking God on how to handle certain situations like holidays and our anniversary. So many days when my husband was around me, I had to restrain myself from reaching out and touching his arm or saying, “I love you.” In the midst of my husband’s sin, God put a love in my heart so deep for my husband it was staggering even to myself that I could love him while he was doing so many things to hurt me.
My brothers and sisters in Christ, listen to me. God will always do what He says He will do. His Word will NEVER return void. Never! Do you hear that? He will restore your marriage and family. He will turn your spouse from darkness back to light. He will soften the hearts of your spouse and children and family members that may not be seeking God’s will for your life, marriage and family but rather is looking at what your spouse is doing and judging the sinner instead of the sin.
Stand in the gap for your spouse while they are in the far country having fall prey to the enemy’s trap of lies and deceit. It doesn’t matter if your spouse is still at home, a mile away or 10,000 miles away. The details are not important. Yes, I know your heart is wounded and every day that passes you feel as though you don’t know how much more pain you can take but go to the greatest healer, Jehova Rapha, Our Lord, and allow Him to heal your heart and wounds. Sekk God on what He wants you to do while He is your spouse this season. Yes, even the men that are standing, God will be your spouse. He will provide everything you need because He is the only one who can meet your needs. The awesome thing about this season you are in is, God will go to work on you too. While my spouse was gone and I cried out to Him to bring my husband home and remove him from sin, God did something wonderful and that was to bring to mind all the things I had done that were sinful and did not line up with His will for me as a wife and Christian. I was ashamed and felt so guilty but God allowed me to repent and ask for forgiveness and then showed me in the Bible how I was to be for my husband and how I was to be as one of His children. I’d search the internet for various things about marriage and found so many teachings that spoke to me on how God designed marriage. I wasn’t the wife God called me to be before but I am now.
Months after my husband moved out, suddenly, just as Bob and Charlyne have proclaimed in so many of their teachings, my husband asked me out to the movies. By the end of the day a simple movie turned to dinner before the movie and an invite to his apartment that I had never been inside before. Three weeks later he was back home and he had ended things with the other person. No one can tell me that God is not in the restoration business. He designed marriage and hates divorce. While He works on you and softens your heart and gives you time to turn away from bitterness, resentment, anger, malice and discontent, He is working on your spouse, gently nudging them, tugging at them and even giving them dreams. My husband said he had no peace and had constant chatter in his head to go home.
God has a plan. He will turn what was meant for your harm for your good and possibly for the first time, your marriage will finally be built the way it should have started out when we took our marriage vows in front of God inviting Him into our marriage but ignoring His will instead. He will restore what the locusts tried to eat and instead give it all back to you double and in ways you can never imagine.
What God is doing in our marriage is beautiful. There is a deeper love, a greater connection. Passion is back that had been lost among years of marriage, complacency, children and life. It is mind boggling because my husband has always been my best friend and I thought we had a great relationship before but it’s nothing compared to what we have now. I remember crying out to God and saying, “Give me back my marriage.” And Him replying with, “I will give you a new one.” I didn’t understand that and then thought, “I’d be fine with my old one, thank you very much.” But now I see. God doesn’t want to give you back your old anything. When He makes a way in something, it will be new.
I am now respecting my husband and submitting to him as the man of the house and my husband is praying over his family and leading our home in Christ. We would have never arrived here without Christ’s intervention. In the midst of the pain, God had a purpose, to bring us back to Him. God knows what He is doing and His will is perfect.(posted 10/1/2012)
“My husband filed for divorce, moved out, then came back home but with little remorse. The OW moved here to be with him. At times it was harder living together like this than living separately. I would pray for God to separate that other relationship by mountains and oceans. And SUDDENLY things changed. Here we are now. He is loving and remorseful, telling me I am the best wife. We are expecting another baby due any day and moving across the ocean to live near mountains, away from the OW. Thank You God for being faithful! I am getting to know my God as Healer, Restorer, and Redeemer and it is incredible! I still look forward to my husband's salvation and surrender to Christ.” (Texas)(posted 1/28/2013)
"The Lord has kept His promise. He continually showed me that my marriage would be restored. Before the Christmas holidays the Lord did just that. Now my wife and I are planning our remarriage celebration. Thank You Lord for keeping Your promise!" (Texas)(posted 2/18/2011)
“Praise God and thank you for sharing Cari and Ryan's video. I can't wait to watch it again with my daughter. I've been standing for my marriage for many years now and my prodigal entered into a non-covenant marriage. Our daughter is about Cari and Ryan's daughter's age, too, and she has given up hope. Nothing is impossible with our God! Praise Him, praise Him, praise Him. I love You Lord!” (Pennsylvania)(posted 10/8/2012)
"After a year of turning his back on his Lord, my husband returned to the Father and to our family. We are in a new town, away from where all the pain happened and able to start a new life. We still need much prayer. However, the blessings have been great and I know God will continue to heal our marriage." (California)(posted 6/7/2007)
“My husband is home after months of being away. PTL! He had an irregular heartbeat and had to be brought to the hospital. Our child and I were there with him at the hospital providing love, support and care. Thank God his condition normalized and he was discharged. I was planning to ask him if he could come for a few days so we could take care of him. Without prompting him, he asked first if he could come home! Oh my! Since then, he has been home and we are starting to be like a family again. I will continue to pray and ask for God's grace to keep us together and grow in love. The Lord is amazing! When I started to let go and let God, that was when God did his part. God works in mysterious ways. He is real, God is good!” (Philippines)(posted 12/10/2013)
"I give Jesus all the praise because my husband is almost moved back in. Most of his belongings are back in the house and he is selling his apartment furniture. I continue to believe that his heart will move spiritually back home to Jesus as well. Nothing is impossible with God." (Canada)(posted 3/27/2009)
"After being separated, moving out of state, and raising an infant on my own, God has spoken life into our marriage. I have moved back into my home, my husband is attending and active in church regularly, and we are committed in letting God lead us in every step of reconciliation. Praise God for His wonderful promises." (Virginia)(posted 6/26/2008)
"After months of reading Charlyne Cares, fasting and praying, God has directed my wife to stay and end her affair. We are starting the reconciliation process, and I know God is in control. Praise be to the One who can reclaim hurting marriages." (Minnesota)(posted 9/28/2007)
"My husband has been home for almost two months. I thank God for the work he has done in me. My husband says that I have changed. He treats me with love. I have been reading the book 'Standing After The Prodigal Returns' and it has been a great support. I know that God, not my actions, restored our marriage. I know that He wants my husband saved. I have learned that God is not far away from me, but very close each and every moment of my day." (Arizona)(posted 8/25/2006)
"My wife and I were divorced. After 14 years we remarried. I’m glad to see the Steinkamp's testimony. It brings hope. I'll certainly be taking advantage of your online teachings to seek ongoing help for our marriage." (Missouri)(posted 11/23/2007)
“God protects his creation, marriage. He is faithful and does keep His promises. The Lord gave me a promise of restoration long before I even knew what ‘standing’ meant. My husband swore it would never happen. Hours before he came home, he wanted to sit down and discuss the visitation schedule for our sons. I told him I refused what Satan wanted for our family and I wouldn't discuss it. Later that night the Lord answered my prayer, sooner than I thought. I had almost given up, but knew I had to hang on and trust HE was taking care of it all. Today, I sit here in awe of our marvelous, almighty, faithful God. He restored, reconciled, and renewed our love and marriage. A marriage that by man's views was long gone. Praise God, I am forever in awe of His love and faithfulness!” (Florida)(posted 8/3/2013)
"Just a thank you for being there, and to let you know that my husband and I are now reconciled. We separated a couple years ago, and God has worked in mighty ways in both of our lives. We just moved back together. God does indeed restore hurting marriages." (Wisconsin)(posted 7/6/2007)
"Praise be to God for bringing my husband home. I thank God for allowing me to show my husband unconditional love. I can see the Lord at work in my husband. I can, for the first time ever, go straight to my Heavenly Father for guidance in my marriage. We still have a long way to go, but praise and glory goes to God that we will be able to take this road together." (California)(posted 3/16/2007)
“After being gone many months, my husband began sleeping at the house...and then he never left. It took six weeks for me to realize he'd moved home! There was no conversation or apology, just a changed man. I had doubts and I wavered (a lot). Every morning I woke up and read the encouragement waiting for me on this site, and then I warily began my day in faith. One day at a time, the many, many months came to an end and in the midst of it all, Charlyne guided me. This woman I'd never met taught me to pray for my husband and how to find comfort in God's Word. This stranger supported me when others doubted me. My husband and I are packing for vacation. God is healing our marriage and restoring it to something more than we could have imagined. A year ago I was hurting so deeply that I couldn't even imagine a day when we would vacation again. Today my heart is full.” (Oklahoma)(posted 8/26/2013)
“After many months in the far country, my husband came home suddenly! Praise God! We are very happy! He is very loving and we are enjoying spending time together and with the children. All God's promises are Yes and Amen. His Word does not come back to Him void. I pray that God continues to draw my husband and my children to himself with cords of love. He is restoring a very close relationship with our brothers and sisters and restoring our home. We are working together as a team on our property and exercising and doing things together. Our God is a God of restoration! "Seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things will be added unto you" Matthew 6:33. Thank you so much to Charlyne and all the team for giving me the assurance to stand in the gap for our marriage in the face of skepticism by others.” (Australia)(posted 7/21/2013)
"Praise God, my husband has returned home. Although he is not admitting that it was God who sent him home, I know that it was the Almighty. I knew my prayers would be answered, but I didn't think it would be so quick. We have a lot of work to do and I know we can do it because I refuse to stop standing and praying." (Florida)(posted 10/11/2008)
“Hallelujah! My spouse has been home for over a year now and it has been challenging at times, BUT God...He has been so good, faithful and direct. What I needed to learn was living out Philippians 4:8-9 and be very, very thankful, spending time praising Him and resting at His feet. Though sometimes I get weary, God answers prayers at His perfect time. One of those is to hear my spouse say thank you and I love you. I got all this recently, quick to praise God! As I was reading the Word, I felt led to Psalm 15 and share this with you, beloved standers. Read verses 4b and 5b, and be encouraged and strengthened once again! All glory to Jesus Christ.” (Malaysia)(posted 12/2/2013)
"Miracles do happen. My wife and I were separated. I was the one who caused the problems, but became the stander for the marriage. I was saved and became a true Christian. My marriage was restored a few months ago. Nothing that happened regarding the restoration was my doing, I gave my marriage to God and in His time He restored our marriage." (New York)(posted 2/26/2010)
“My husband came home a few months ago, but he did not come home clean. At first he wouldn't accept my love or God's love, but now he is letting me love him and coming to church with me and starting to get involved there. It has been a struggle and many times I wanted to give up. It actually seemed harder having him home not loving me and the kids than when he was gone, because my circumstance was right in front of me when he came home. I have cried out to the Lord so many times in desperation, and He has given me the strength to continue to do what is right in His eyes. I am trusting the Lord to finish the good work He started in my marriage, and I continue to cling to Him and His promises. He gave me this verse: Exodus 14:13,14. I just want to encourage everyone to NEVER GIVE UP and wait for God's perfect timing. He will NEVER fail you! I love You Lord!” (Canada)(posted 12/3/2012)
"I want to give God the glory for restoring my family. It has been a long journey, but after being separated and planning on divorcing, my husband came home last month. My children are so happy and although we still have a lot of work to do, God is working it all out." (California)(posted 3/14/2008)
“My wife left me years ago. We reconciled after a few months only to separate again and eventually divorce. Although I was led to RMM through a friend's bumper-sticker and began to stand, it seemed that each month we were more and more alienated from each other. When things were at their worst, communication sad and hurtful, the kids aching and life very hard, God quite suddenly reversed the downward spiral. He (and He alone!) began to soften first my heart, then my wife's. He allowed opportunities for me to show my love to her again. And He started a process where each month we began to fall in love more and more all over again. Praise to His precious Name and Glory, we were remarried this past summer and are still growing in His love. HE is doing this restoration, and it is clearly HIS plan. In fact, He has used these past years to teach me so much and open His Word to my heart. I can thank Him for these trials, even though the hard times are so hard, His love and plan never failed.” (Oregon)(posted 2/11/2014)
“I got your website from a friend and since that day it has provided inspiration and hope for my tomorrow. After struggling for 18 months, my husband has decided that our marriage of 16 years is worth fighting for. I bless God that he has left the other woman and returned both to God and his family. I realize that it is not always easy, but I thank God for restoration has come to my household. I want to encourage anyone else going through this, remember God honors covenant. As he was with Abraham, He will be with you, but you have to trust Him. Praying for marriages worldwide and ask that you keep us in your prayers, that God will strengthen us.” (Bahamas)(posted 10/7/2013)
“I am praising God today and every day. My husband and I were remarried Tuesday after five years of separation and divorce. Though my stand was very hard, God never let me give up even when I begged Him. I thank Him that He didn't allow it. Thank you also Bob and Charlyne for your support and prayers.” (Mississippi)(posted 8/31/2012)